like me, but with a strong voice.

I stumbled upon a blog late last night that was like a slap in the face, in more ways than one. The writer of Violent Acres is driven to write "simply because [she] has things to say." The things she has to say aren't always nice - or even really repeatable in a lot of mixed company - but I believe they are honest expressions of her thoughts and feelings, and as for truth, well, she explains how truth is rubbery and writing a live memoir is hard, etc., especially when it is the memoir of a hard life, and I know all this to be true because I've struggled with it myself for years. Whatever the reality, whatever her (?) reasons for writing, she does it. And what I read there made me unable to sleep. Made me realize that I don't need any more reason than that either. Those who struggle must cry out eventually.

I have things to say too. I want to thank this anonymous person for being herself, and for realizing that there are children locked in their bare rooms who may need to read it. I want to thank her for inspiring me to finally find a way to say what I want and need to say. To reach out. To be honest freely, and with no apologies.

I think we write these things because we HAVE to cope, because society expects it of us. Because we can't survive any other way. Because there is no more room in this world for the berserker and the ulfserker. Because although we are antisocial, we must be butterflies or we are born butterflies who are made to be antisocial. Either way, our wings don't fit and neither do we.

-AB